I am writing this story of how I became a Dafa practitioner in hopes that it might When As I got a little older and became more familiar Shortly At that time, I knew Even It was at that time, when I The next couple times that I read When After The Sometimes,
serve as a good reminder to other practitioners who, after so many years of cultivation,
may have slacked off or lost their initial enthusiasm for cultivation. I hope
this story will remind practitioners of just how fortunate we are, and how much
has been done for us in this cultivation process.
I was a young child, I would often contemplate the meaning of life. I always sought
to get closer to nature so as to understand the underlying reasons and order of
things in the universe. I knew, as most everyone must, that there was something
more to life than what was being presented to me. Perhaps it was childish self-centeredness,
or maybe it wasn't, but I always felt that destiny had great things in store
for me.
with the workings of this secular society, I grew increasingly pessimistic and
fearful that I would never discover the true purpose of my life. This prospect
haunted me day in and day out, eventually causing me so much anxiety that it even
became difficult to breathe. By the time I was 11, I had grown very bitter towards
the world and the apparent meaninglessness of life, and my health began to deteriorate.
By age 13, I had started drinking excessively and doing and selling drugs. My
lifestyle led me to adopt many warped notions; I fully subscribed to communist
theories, and even read communist literature. I was also staunchly opposed to
traditional morality, particularly towards upright religions, and eventually I
stopped believing in right and wrong altogether.
after turning 14, I was kicked out of my house. By that time I was starting to
have pancreas problems from drinking too much. I couldn't make it through
the day without a drink, and was almost a completely dysfunctional human being.
My mind had become so complex and full of chaotic notions that I couldn't
sit through a whole day of school or stay awake through class. Even the simplest
tasks had become nearly impossible.
I had to change the direction of my life. I began devoting myself more to spiritual
pursuits. Though I was extremely foggy-headed, I came to understand that I must
find a way to achieve internal freedom, let go of my notions, and live in harmony
with the universe. I also thought that I should blaze a path towards doing this,
so that others in the future would not have to endure the same kind of struggles
that I had. The problem was, I had no idea how to work towards this goal. Throughout
my life I had been exposed to a number of new age theories and religious philosophies,
but none of them struck me as being very profound or genuine.
though I had started to put my life back in order, I still lived with a near constant
worry that I would never discover the meaning of this life. I was still plagued
by health problems, including some lingering effects of the drugs I did when I
was younger. My relationships with my family were generally poor (I barely spoke
with my father for years), and I did countless degenerate things, some of which
are even painful to remember.
I was 15-years-old, that a friend introduced me to Falun Gong.
can still vividly remember the first night I started reading Zhuan Falun.
I was in a very bitter mood, and was also feeling quite angry and jealous. Since
I had nothing else to do, I picked up Zhuan Falun and read the first lecture.
The principles contained within it struck a deep chord with me. Even though much
of the vocabulary was over my head, there was something familiar and comforting
about the book. By the time I was done, I had a remarkable sensation that I had
never experienced before. It was a sense of true calm, of contentment from the
bottom of my heart. The jealousy and bitterness that only hours before had seemed
to consume me disappeared. That night, I went to sleep smiling, and got the best
sleep of my life. A part of me understood that I no longer needed to fear never
finding the meaning of life. I felt like my thousand-year wait was finally over.
I had finally come home.
the book were even more extraordinary. When I read, the air would smell sweeter,
everything around me would glow in a white light, and I could feel my mind becoming
immense and broad. I think that Master must have been offering me encouragement.
I finally decided to commit myself to the path of Dafa cultivation, I started
to experience many of the things described in Zhuan Falun. My illnesses
all disappeared in a very short period of time. Within about a week of becoming
determined to be a Dafa disciple and learning the exercises and how to send righteous
thoughts, I was involved in a car accident. An SUV slammed into the car door that
I was sitting next to, crushing the door and shattering the glass. At that time,
I was not worried or hurt (though I was spitting out glass for a while).
I obtained the Fa, old friends would always comment that I looked much younger
(how much younger could I get?), and that my face looked so much more radiant.
My relationships with my family were also finally mended. In particular, my relationship
with my father had a turning point the first time I told him about Falun Gong.
Although he's a very serious man with no spiritual or religious beliefs,
he had an unexplainable and immediate affinity towards Falun Gong. Having seen
the dramatic changes in my character, he became very supportive of Dafa. He even
supported me in my Dafa work (financially) and sometimes helped pay for trips
to conferences. My mother also took an immediate liking to Falun Gong, and both
of them often talk to their friends about the persecution.
next year, I graduated from high school one year early and at the top of my class.
In the span of a little over two years, the changes in my life were dramatic.
I had gone from nearly dropping out of school, being distant and cold towards
my family, drinking almost every day, indulging in countless degenerate activities,
and being self-centered and jealous to being a Dafa disciple. Master truly has
scooped me up from hell and renewed my whole being, from the very microcosm.
when I am a little slack in my cultivation, I look out at the city and think to
myself: why, among so many hundreds of thousands of people, am I one of the relatively
few people who obtained the Fa here? Isn't there someone else out there who
could do a better job than me to validate the Fa? I look at my own history in
this life, and it's hard to fathom that a person who made as many mistakes
as me could be fortunate enough to obtain Dafa. I wonder, what makes me worthy
of such a great honour? Then I remember that I am only worthy on the condition
that I fulfil the vows made before history to save the people here. We Dafa disciples
were not given this honour for our own sake, but for all those sentient beings
who are waiting to be saved.
Posting date: 31/Dec/2005
Original
article date: 26/Dec/2005
Category: Personal
Cultivation
